Toying with the Nervous Center

The human thinking process is fascinating. There are times when my subconscious will briefly net in some strange tidbit of life and then release it just as quickly. It may be a certain impression of someone, a brief emotional flutter, or a new opinion of an issue. In a span of what seems to be only a millisecond, I will have this jumbled up epiphany and then fail to hold on to it. It's sort of like trying to do 3 by 3 multiplication in your head and not being able to recall the numbers you already figured out. I wish I could think slowly and patiently in these situations.

One interesting exercise I'm capable of doing is briefly forgetting who I am. By this, I mean forgetting that I am a student at Oxford Academy who lives in Southern California who looks the way I do and does the things I do. It is a self-inflicted amnesia. When I became aware of this ability, I tried to consciously forget to see if I could do it. It is extremely difficult. I've done it about five times so far, and it's becoming harder. But the feeling is really otherworldly. You have to be deeply daydreaming about things and then reach so far into your imagination that you forget you who you are. The duration of the amnesia lasts about a second or two and then it takes about three seconds to fully retrieve my memory. During this recovery period, I often look at the palms of my hands and then my surroundings (like homework assignments due the next day) and then slowly gather myself.

The brain is supposed to be constantly aware of itself so I am trying to see what would happen if this is changed. I'm hoping that this will yield unique insights. But is this also related to the fact that my memory has been deteriorating?

Bizarre.